"i am no hero, but i do know one thing. where you are is where i wanna be." Where are you going- Dave Matthews Band

so, tonight i'm going to post something pretty deep. prepare yourselves. the subject is opinions of others. she may kill me for posting about her, but heres the situation that is prompting all this. i have a friend who we'll call kate. [no. not her real name.] kate is in an extremely controversial relationship. she fell in love with someone, a married, father, someone. we'll call him chris. most, including myself, dont agree with that particular set of conditions. however, chris treats kate like a princess, like she is the only girl on the planet. they are so unbelievably blissful and happy with one another. chris has been unhappily married for quite some time and agrees that he didnt get things right the first time around, and knows that what he's doing isnt necessarily the RIGHT thing, in terms of morality, but he strongly feels as though kate is the one for him. and she feels the same way. seeing these two together you can just tell that they are meant for each other, no matter the circumstance on how they met.

most would argue that kate is a "homewrecker" or a "slut", and they could be totally justified. but at the same time, its not really the case. while the majority of society would shun this relationship, and they wouldnt condone cheating in any way, shape, or form, this relationship is different. its different in that chris is unhappily married, but feels bound to his wife because of the child they share, and mind you, he has every intention of ending things with his wife. its a matter of time before this happens.

i guess i should get to my point, eh?

the friends of both involved have their own opinions on the matter. some agree. some dont. for example, kate has a friend we'll call marie. marie does nothing but question and grill kate on the subject of her relationship everytime they speak. she is very open on how horrible the two are being, and how they are ruining the lives of people. she backhandly calls kate a whore and all that good stuff. which again, is justified to an extent.

but shouldn't we as her friends put our own opinions aside? i think so. again, if you saw these two together, you'd get it. you'd see how much they mean to one another, how much they love each other. i know, its morally corrupt, i understand that. but again, the opinions of others shouldnt really matter here. at all. i mean, i know they ask about it. but in the end, its the two of them that decide how their lives are lived.

so i guess what i'm trying to get across here is, no matter how much we disagree with something a good friend of ours does, shouldnt we at least support them in what they want to do? shouldnt we be happy for them as long as they're happy? in the event that something go awry, then we can be angry and say the i told you so's if need be. but i think overall, no matter our opinions on what our friends do, the main focus should always be on their happiness. no matter what.

to kate and chis, you guys will last, i really feel that you will. i know i hardly know you, chris. but i like you. you treat my friend like she should be treated. she had a pretty shitty relationship a while back, something she still has to handle, and you do nothing but make her the happiest i've ever seen her. i dont know the whole story with your wife, but i'm confident that you will do what is right in time. i know youre not an asshole, and that you have a heart of gold. you will do whats best for her, and your son. who, by the way, is quite adorable.

and to you kate, i love you, you know that. i'm so glad you and i have become friends this year. i like having you around. you listen to my rants and stories about nothing, you help me out. you save me from boredom, and eat with me once a week. :D but really, i'm glad you've found this guy. i see how happy he makes you. just know that nobody's opinion but yours is the one that matters. on anything, but especially this. do what makes you happy, kid. dont worry about the people who talk down to it, and you. they dont matter. something tells me you know that though.


and to anyone that reads this. i know your initial opinions on this will more than likely be negative. so please, dont comment anything rude. thats not necessary. if you know these people, dont expose their real names. i'm doing this because i wanted to let them know that while a lot of people might hate them for this, someone is on their side.

and if any of these statements are untrue, please tell me and i will correct them. also, if you guys want anything added, i can do that too.

:]


edit: i have been asked to make this clear, chris wants everyone to know that his wife is NOT a bad person. she's a lovely person, for the most part. its not that shes a bad person. they just dont mesh anymore. so please, dont think that his wife is a bad person. thank you.