Apology.

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for anything that I've done thats pissed you off.
I'm sorry for not being everything you've wanted me to be.
I'm sorry i cant live up to the expectations everyone has of me.
I'm sorry for being less than a friend to most of you.
I'm sorry for panicking about the things that shouldn't be panicked over.
I'm sorry for pretending that the things you say don't bother me.
I'm sorry for my inability to change you.
I'm sorry for trying.
I'm sorry for failing.
I'm sorry for acting.
I'm sorry for not showing you the real me.
I'm sorry for hiding.
I'm sorry for my overbearingness.
I'm sorry for the stupid things i do.
I'm sorry for not being able to save you.
I'm sorry for not being there when you needed me.
I'm sorry for being selfish.
I'm sorry for being annoying.
I'm sorry for this long list of apologies.

To put it simply, I'm sorry for everything.
I know anyone that reads this can relate to one of the things above.
I don't know the motive behind all this.
I woke up this morning in a less than amazing mood.
I just feel so guilty about so much. So many of those things I cannot change.
It's those things that I want to change the most.
I've become something that I never wanted to be. most of you wont know what that means, but it's true.
I feel like a hypocrite.
feel like I say one thing, and then do another.
I don't know whats wrong with me right now, I really don't.
writing about it isn't helping either.

to anyone that reads this: chances are, you mean a lot to me.
i thank you for everything that you've done for me.
i love you.