Thursday, June 24, 2010

time for a legitimate post.

I have written anything worth reading in quite some time, so tonight that is what i will do.
before doing so, i must put forth the following disclaimers:

#1: there is no line of reason for what i am about to post. there is good chance that none of this will make a lick of sense. i would apologize for that, but i'm not really all that sorry. :p

#2: parts of this could get quite whiney. if you are not in the mood, i suggest you stop reading now. :]

#3: there is no three, i'm just keeping you on your toes at this point.

what to start with? hmm. well. we'll just go through the list.

work is good. still dont hate it.. you people told me i'd grow to hate it. liars. i keep getting complimented on my zen-like state of mind. i'm apparently always chipper and happy, even when cranky old men are busy throwing 12-packs of coke at me, or when some lady comes in with a thousand expired coupons. my boss-lady [i will not name names, just cuz that could get messy. you understand, dont you?] is quite nice. everyone i work with is really nice. i like it. i was terribly afraid that they would all hate me because i knew, as did they, that i only got this job because my mom hooked me up with it.

i had a terrible fear of working with the photo machines for the first couple weeks. its intimidating, messing with people's pictures. but its not a problem now. i get it.

i have figured out who i prefer working with. i honestly dont mind anyone too much. i just have a couple of girls i like more than the others.

okay. thats enough about that. you dont care about that. :p

i'm starting to go a bit stir crazy in my house. i love my family and all, dont get me wrong. but i miss my life. i miss it so much. i miss being able to do what i want, when i want. i cannot do that here. i had a horrible couple of days this week. i was in this terrible mood. i was very self critical and pessimistic. it was terrible. but as much as that sucked, i learned stuff about myself. thats always good. i realized that i am painfully shy and overly self critical. i hate situations that are entirely unfamiliar. i dont have the ability to just go out and talk to strangers. i have to be forced into it. and let me tell ya, that makes it really difficult to meet people.

i also discovered that i'm extremely good at faking emotions. i could be completely miserable and you would see pure contentment. i guess its my number one defense mechanism. its how i maintain such a good attitude, i guess. there are times where i want to scream at people, but instead i just smile and move on. hmm. yeah. thats a problem.

yesterday was terrible. and thats all we'll say about that.

i requested kayla's birthday weekend off. so. i'm gonna head up to purdue and see her! so exciting! i've already got ideas in my head for her present. its going to be positively wonderful. :] ps. i miss you beef!

i got my final estimates for financial aid. i'm good. thank god. i was so very worried about it.

i'm going to the vampire weekend concert with deidre on september 6th. that is going to be the best thing ever. :] she's buying our tickets in the morning. super stoked.

there is a plethora of shit i could write on a subject i know none of you care about, so i'll refrain. i'll be dealing with it eventually though. so. yeah.

okay. i guess i'm done now. :] see you kids later!

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